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Rollercoaster... 
16th-Dec-2009 10:40 pm
jae
So. In the last three weeks -

* I had 4 job interviews
* Got offered a job
* Started the job (4 days later...)
* Bought a car
* Found a place to move out to in late January with friends

and today...

my cat died.

He was 19 years old and had been with me since I was 6. He's been struggling all this year, and had to have surgery a little while back... I've known it was coming... but mum called me at work today and told me he'd collapsed and the vet had to put him down. He'd stopped eating, and was really weak, so it was probably best for him. It didn't stop me bawling though, in the middle of work.

I really don't understand why this is all happening right now. Everything, all at once. I've gone on for years without anything significant happening, and suddenly it's like I jumped into a whole different life somehow. I mean, most of the stuff has been good, but I'm all teary now because Jamie has been my 'baby' for so long, and while we used to have two cats, now there are none. We've had cats almost all my life and now, it's going to be weird without one.

My dad said something that made me cry all the harder - that it all 'fit' together. Like Jamie knew I'd be moving out soon, and that it was time to move on himself. He held on a lot longer then we'd expected... I guess I just thought he'd keep on holding on even though I know it had to happen sometime.

Oh shit, I'm crying again. Going to bed now.


... I wish I had taken more pictures of him.
Comments 
16th-Dec-2009 11:44 am (UTC)
Oh Loki, I'm sorry to hear about Jaemie's passing...19 years is truly a long time. I believe Jaemis has many, many years of fond memories with you and your family.
16th-Dec-2009 12:31 pm (UTC)
*hugs tight* He's in a better place. A way better place. Like Chloe said, 19 is a long time. You're pull through this. I believe in you.
16th-Dec-2009 12:47 pm (UTC)
oh bb at least you had many great years with Jamie? and he's in a much better place now /hugs tight/ strong bb is strong, yeah?
16th-Dec-2009 01:44 pm (UTC)
i'm sure Jamie'd had a good life these 19 years n it'll continue to be so on the other side.

wt that thought, hope u feel a little better sweety.

had my share of the same experience too.somewhat understands how you feel.

and yeah, good luck wt the new job.Hope everything will go fine and as planned.
16th-Dec-2009 01:53 pm (UTC)
He was so pretty. *offers hugs* I'm so sorry. I know how much it hurts to have a pet die, especially when you can't be there. My mom called me while I was away at college to tell me that our dog had died, and it didn't even feel real until the next time I went home and he wasn't there to greet my car.

I know it's cheesy, but the story of the Rainbow Bridge always makes me feel a little bit better. It makes me cry a lot first, but then it makes me feel better.
16th-Dec-2009 02:05 pm (UTC)
*hugs you* sorry about your cat.

he's in a better place now, this world has too much of terrorists, wars, diseases, and people suing each others anyway.

be strong.
16th-Dec-2009 02:17 pm (UTC)
aww sweetie.. i'm so sorry to hear about your loss, he must be one of your closest friend.

i lost my cat a few months ago too. she was 16 years old. when my mom told me, i didnt feel anything cause i figured it was her time (she has been sick for a few months). i didnt even shed a tear until a few weeks after that when i kept thinking about her. i cried like a baby and i had to say goodbye. i think the most important thing is loki; to have a good closure.

yes, you'll think of him from time to time but it's only natural. but you must let go.. he knew you and loved you too, am sure. *big hugs to you*

also, even tho it's not appropriate here congrats for the new job.. big changes with the car and the move, sweetie but all is good yes?

i've been wanting to reply your email to me but i've been sick for quite some time and was also looking for jobs and stuff. let's catch up when we can?

(i havent send out the package to you.. can i still send to the same address? or to your new address you're moving to?)

guh. i missed you so much <33333
16th-Dec-2009 02:28 pm (UTC)
Just wanted to give you a virtual hug. No one who's never had a pet will understand how it feels to lose one - they're family. Like you said, he was your 'baby'. And it must be hard on you with the stress of so much change happening lately. I hope things slow down enough for you to absorb properly and flow with. I hope soon you can think of and remember Jamie without crying, and will smile instead. Hang in there <3
16th-Dec-2009 03:00 pm (UTC)
honey, it'll be okay. i still miss mine that i had for 19 years. it's always good to have someone waiting for you and watching over you. :::nods::: he'll always be there with you.
16th-Dec-2009 04:44 pm (UTC)
I'm so sorry to hear that ;______; Even if they're old and we know they'll have to go someday, it's always so hard to lose a beloved pet :(

He was 19, though... to live so long he must've been treated really well. I'm sure he had a wonderful life with you :)♥



Congratualtions about getting a job, btw!!
16th-Dec-2009 06:31 pm (UTC)
omigosh, bb!
so sorry.
:[

I wish you luck on your interviews!
17th-Dec-2009 01:57 am (UTC)
.......... ;__________; this post made me cry. I'm so sorry about your cat ;___; he was really beautiful and maybe what your dad said was true ;; animals can sense things like that. he probably wanted to stay with you as long as he could. but now he's gone to a better place, just like you will be. rest in peace, kitty ;;
17th-Dec-2009 05:40 am (UTC)
I'm so so sorry. ;_; I started to cry when I read. I'm happy you had such a wonderful & long time with him. Cats add something indescribable to our lives. I'll be thinking about you~
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